What do you want me to do, my Lord?
If all else fails, a direct question is the easiest. Recall the meaning of prayer is to talk to God, and ask him that question rather. It's as simple as that.
It's not "What should I do, Lord?" question either, a sort of christian ethical dillema. It's a question that is personalized with all of your individual circumstances, strengths, weaknesses, and opportunities where you fail to come up with a solid decision in life not because you're confused with ethical principles but because the situations are so novel. Like nobody knows what job in the future AI opportunities will create. Of course God can understand all the wordings of our simple prayer. It's just that the prayer is much bigger than ignorance of christian ethics. Although if it is really a kind of need already for discernment, the question what should I do must take up the process of discernment without further ado.
I know what I want. But somehow I long for God's love of what he rather wants for me. Such divine provisions in the future is what is unknown and causes too much anxiety. If we can only put it tenderly in God's loving care. Cast all your cares unto the Lord, for he surely cares for you. (1 Peter 5:7)
A priest friend once told me his story that he is asking God to have the finances for his ordination. Although he wants money of course, the day of the ordination came without any hint of money being given by anybody and going into his hands or bank account. Although cashless, his ordination ended without him releasing a single peso. Everybody knows he doesn't have any, and so sponsors for every little things he needed was answered by the people who knows him. God still answered what he prayed for although not just in the way he wants it answered. My point is that if what you asked for in prayer from the bottom of your heart is ethically good, God would not go against it, he will give it, but maybe not in your own terms.
Recall my desire for electronics engineering job. It was actually answered, not just in the way I want it answered. Although I'm earning from something else I was gifted to do, on the other side, I was given the skill to repair computers and vulnerabilities and now I'm realigning myself to the broader field of AI, earning not that much but doing it much enjoyed like a hobby. Now we need to always want what God wants for us because He knows what is best for us, not to crush what he implanted in us as a great good desire, but to answer it in the way He seems best fitted for us. If I studied electronics engineering then, curriculum then don't have programming things yet like C programming for microcontrollers, etc. God knows what will happen in the future. I don't know what could have happened too. What I just know is that God gave me the job I wanted to do which was what I was asking but more fitted to my capacity and expectations. As they say, God knows us more than we know ourselves.
God has no potentiality. He is Pure Act. He doesn't play with what we want. If there is one primary and overarching element on St. Ignatius of Loyola's Daily Examen, it is gratitude. As is our pheno reflection here, we will not be able to see God's hands without appreciating it. Mostly because of the cross we need to bear, we focus on those things that pains us. But there is always two sides on a coin, the tail and the head. We will not be able to continue to bear that cross also without seeing the things we are already grateful that God has gifted us already with. Gratitude is not a simple thing therefore. It was the athmosphere that the master of discernment has told us to cultivate. And our heart's desires wouldn't find its voice either in complaining and hopelessness, the Bible told.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.-Philippians 4:6-7
Let me see oh Lord your goodness despite the evil that I experience. Amen.
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